(Credit: Daily Mail)
“Don’t look, don’t look” I say in my head as a stranger takes out her makeup bag and proceeds to transform her face into one that is blemish free and splashed with colour. Wait. A few seats down, another one begins to create the winged effect as the tube grinds to a halt allowing a flick to be created at the edge of the eye. Someone else searches through the contents to find that Chanel lipstick, perfect for a morning boardroom meeting. That folks, represents 67% of women who apply makeup on a tube according to a study that was carried out back in 2012. I bet that figure has increased a year later but I certainly won’t be a statistic. Applying makeup on the tube? No, couldn’t do and wouldn’t do it. How do women sit on the tube in front of gawking strangers and paint their faces, with some doing a rather terrible job anyway?
I would have a rotten time trying to apply the basics. It was hard enough to master the art of applying eyeliner which the girls reading this would agree with but replicating that on the Piccadilly line? Oh no. Every line has to be equal, every flick has to be perfect and I just wouldn’t be able to create the perfect winged effect on the move. It takes a bloomin’ steady hand and so the fact that only 33% of women would attempt this is not surprising at all. I’d be equally worried about getting the mascara out in case I ended up poking myself in the eye and having tears running down my face. Panda eyes in the morning? No thank you. Any girl reading this would agree that whilst applying makeup, there are one hundred and one different facial expressions and movements we end up making – pouting, squinting, squeezing our cheeks in and shifting the head slightly to see if that spot got covered. Displaying that at 8am is not my thing.
It’s clear that women just don’t have time to do their makeup – I struggle to just about get some kohl, mascara and blush on in the morning. But girls, you can make time! I know I certainly do. It’s less hassle on a packed tube where the chances of accidents are far more likely….